My secret life as a gay ultra-Orthodox Jew
11 April 2016 Chaya, not her real name, is an ultra-Orthodox Jewish woman who is gay. Here she describes her struggle to accept her sexuality, and why she has to keep it a secret from those who would make her choose between her identity and her family. I would lose everything if I came out. We are a tightly knit community and I think few people realise just how isolated we are. In the world I live in, being gay is the equivalent of being a bad person. It's seen as an evil desire that is completely unnatural. Soon after, my parents began to arrange a marriage for me. There is often a matchmaker involved in problem cases like mine People I have grown up with would wonder what else I could be capable of. Few would believe that I could still be religious and if I did eventually leave the Haredi community it would mean losing my job, my home and potentially my children. It's just easier for everyone to pretend that there is nothing different about me. In fact, most pe
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